In 2011, Indonesia blessed us with one of the greatest action films of this millennium, The Raid, a masterclass in how to do close-quarters combat in a tight space under dire circumstances. For the uninitiated, it introduced new action stars and brought Pencak Silat to the forefront of martial arts cinema. It also did it […]
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Eye See You (2002)
Eye See You AKA: D-Tox Agent Jake Malloy is on the trail of a ruthless serial killer who likes to play games with his victims. Malloy boasts that he’s close to catching him, but when the murderer kills Malloy’s friend, and then his girlfriend, right under the agent’s nose, not even the killer’s death can […]
Read moreJesus Christ Vampire Hunter (2001) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
Canada has given us many fantastic things over the years: comedians, beer, embarrassing photographs of their prime ministers, hockey supremacists, more beer, the list goes on and on. And most of those things are good. But are they truly great? Well…yes, ok, Canada has given the United States some truly great stuff. Awesome job, guys. […]
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Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust (2008)
Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust AKA: Gingerdead Man 2: Bakery of Blood Cheatem Studios has a long, gloriously sordid history of making low-budget cult films. The founder’s son, Kelvin, is trying to create worthy successors to his father’s legacy and keep the studio out of bankruptcy. One of his current projects? Tiny Terrors […]
Read moreRunaway (1984) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
I can confirm that Tom Selleck’s mustache is great no matter the year, no matter the genre. You can practically feel the machismo oozing off of his upper lip’s grizzled fur baby. If you learn nothing else today, know that your face will never look as cool as his befollicled nasal undercarriage. And for that, […]
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Thankskilling 3 (2012)
Thankskilling 3 The evil, murderous fowl known as Turkie, returns to wreak havoc upon a new batch of unsuspecting strangers on his search to recover the last remaining copy of the infamous “Thankskilling 2”. On his quest, he has to contend with the wig-wearing creators of Thanksgiving Land, a crude rapping grandma, a robot with […]
Read moreDance of the Dead (2008) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
I didn’t go to my Senior Prom. School dances were never really my thing, despite having been to several, and I didn’t see much difference between a Homecoming versus a Prom. Why go to a place to grind, get drunk, and have awkward teenager sex under the watchful eye of an old guy nicknamed “Coach” […]
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Trog (1970)
Trog Trog starts out with a group of collage kids decide to go spelunking in an undocumented and oddly highly illuminated cave. Going against common sense they decide to not only explore the cave, but to also explore the little water chasm beneath the cave, stripping down to their skivvies and diving right in. This […]
Read moreKnock Off (1998) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
I love action movies with completely nonsensical, ridiculous plots that exist purely to put some completely miscast action star directly in the path of danger, possibly alongside an equally miscast comedian in a sidekick role. Lo and behold, here’s exactly what I want in a film: Knock Off. Jean-Claude Van Damme is a member of […] […]
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Killer Crocodile 2 (1990)
Killer Crocodile 2 Sure he eats everybody, but how can you hate him? Look how happy he is to be back! Set some unspecified time after the events of the first film, gung-ho New York newspaper reporter, Liza, is sent off to investigate the exact same area of swamp as the previous film. A powerful […]
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