I can confirm that Tom Selleck’s mustache is great no matter the year, no matter the genre. You can practically feel the machismo oozing off of his upper lip’s grizzled fur baby. If you learn nothing else today, know that your face will never look as cool as his befollicled nasal undercarriage. And for that, […]
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Thankskilling 3 (2012)
Thankskilling 3 The evil, murderous fowl known as Turkie, returns to wreak havoc upon a new batch of unsuspecting strangers on his search to recover the last remaining copy of the infamous “Thankskilling 2”. On his quest, he has to contend with the wig-wearing creators of Thanksgiving Land, a crude rapping grandma, a robot with […]
Read moreDance of the Dead (2008) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
I didn’t go to my Senior Prom. School dances were never really my thing, despite having been to several, and I didn’t see much difference between a Homecoming versus a Prom. Why go to a place to grind, get drunk, and have awkward teenager sex under the watchful eye of an old guy nicknamed “Coach” […]
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Trog (1970)
Trog Trog starts out with a group of collage kids decide to go spelunking in an undocumented and oddly highly illuminated cave. Going against common sense they decide to not only explore the cave, but to also explore the little water chasm beneath the cave, stripping down to their skivvies and diving right in. This […]
Read moreKnock Off (1998) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
I love action movies with completely nonsensical, ridiculous plots that exist purely to put some completely miscast action star directly in the path of danger, possibly alongside an equally miscast comedian in a sidekick role. Lo and behold, here’s exactly what I want in a film: Knock Off. Jean-Claude Van Damme is a member of […] […]
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Killer Crocodile 2 (1990)
Killer Crocodile 2 Sure he eats everybody, but how can you hate him? Look how happy he is to be back! Set some unspecified time after the events of the first film, gung-ho New York newspaper reporter, Liza, is sent off to investigate the exact same area of swamp as the previous film. A powerful […]
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Killer Crocodile (1989)
Killer Crocodile A group of young environmentalists are investigating some rural swamp lands after getting reports of illegal dumping. Their suspicions are confirmed when they find multiple barrels containing some form of radioactive waste hidden deep within the swamp. But their discovery turns into a life or death struggle, when they not only have to […]
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Death Warmed Up (1984)
Dr. Archer Howell is determined to make humans immortal and believes he has the means and the knowledge to make it happen. His theories have already proven successful on mice, and he is now convinced the best way to further prove his hypothesis is by reanimating human corpses. Unfortunately for him, Professor Tucker thinks he’s […]
Read moreSabretooth (2002) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
Yet another made-for-TV Sci Fi Channel original movie. With terrible scripts, low rent CG, and low budgets consisting of pocket change and a used gum wrapper, these movies are perhaps more famous for being rip offs of better movie than they are for the list of B-list, C-list, and God only knows what-list levels of […] […]
Read moreSpace Truckers (1996) — Movie Reviews by a Mook
Blue collar space movies are always a delight. Often times they’re full of working class Joes who are highly skilled at what they do but are not always the brightest when it comes to whatever terrible situation they find themselves getting into. Alien is the high mark, but the misfits of Dark Star, the non-astronauts […]
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Random Movie Musings 