Bloody New Year Six twenty-somethings trying to enjoy a fun weekend at a seaside community, end up running aground while on a boat excursion and find themselves stranded on an island. They manage to take refuge in a quaint little hotel, but quickly find themselves very confused. Despite being open, the hotel seems suspiciously deserted, […]
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The Children Elaine and her husband Jonah take their two kids and Elaine’s eldest daughter, Casey, to visit Elaine’s sister Chloe and her husband Robbie, and their two children at their isolated country home over the New Year’s weekend. They’re not even through the front door before Elaine’s son, Paulie, throws up outside. Chalking it […]
Read moreIn 2011, Indonesia blessed us with one of the greatest action films of this millennium, The Raid, a masterclass in how to do close-quarters combat in a tight space under dire circumstances. For the uninitiated, it introduced new action stars and brought Pencak Silat to the forefront of martial arts cinema. It also did it […]
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Silent Night It’s Christmas Eve, and a small Midwestern town is preparing for their annual Santa parade. But while most of the populace is getting ready for the festivities, the local police department is secretly scrambling, desperately trying to find the culprit in a series of gruesome murders. Their only clue so far is a […]
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Sonic: Christmas Blast The titular speedy blue hedgehog just wants to go out and buy his girlfriend a Christmas present. But unbeknownst to him, Dr. Robotnik has kidnapped Santa Clause and taken his place, so that instead of handing out presents, he can use his army of robots to demand them from stores and people […]
Read moreI’ve watched a lot of television over the years. When I was a kid, my summer schedule was just as likely to revolve around Gilligan’s Island reruns as it was whatever the latest Saturday morning cartoon hit happened to be. F-Troop, The X-Files, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Cheers, The Simpsons, The Munsters, Get Smart, […]
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Gingerdead Man 3: Saturday Night Cleaver Thanks to some very blind and misguided animal activists, The Gingerdead Man is freed from his pastry prison and, with the help of some helpfully placed bumbling scientists, manages to evade his pursuers and escape into the distant past of…. 1976. He quickly loses his time traveling device, and […]
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Eye See You AKA: D-Tox Agent Jake Malloy is on the trail of a ruthless serial killer who likes to play games with his victims. Malloy boasts that he’s close to catching him, but when the murderer kills Malloy’s friend, and then his girlfriend, right under the agent’s nose, not even the killer’s death can […]
Read moreCanada has given us many fantastic things over the years: comedians, beer, embarrassing photographs of their prime ministers, hockey supremacists, more beer, the list goes on and on. And most of those things are good. But are they truly great? Well…yes, ok, Canada has given the United States some truly great stuff. Awesome job, guys. […]
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Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust AKA: Gingerdead Man 2: Bakery of Blood Cheatem Studios has a long, gloriously sordid history of making low-budget cult films. The founder’s son, Kelvin, is trying to create worthy successors to his father’s legacy and keep the studio out of bankruptcy. One of his current projects? Tiny Terrors […]
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Random Movie Musings 