Unlawful Duties Two police officers are sent to investigate a local drug-related disturbance in the area one night. When they get to the location they don’t find any drug dealers, just a local homeless man who seems to peddle in street card games. One of the officers engages him in a game, but the other […]
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The Sadist The Sadist is the story of three high school teachers, Ed, Doris, and Carl who are on their way to a baseball game. On the way to the event, they run into a little car trouble and pull over at a nearby gas station/junkyard. After a quick inspection, Ed determines that they will […]
Read moreIn 2011, Indonesia blessed us with one of the greatest action films of this millennium, The Raid, a masterclass in how to do close-quarters combat in a tight space under dire circumstances. For the uninitiated, it introduced new action stars and brought Pencak Silat to the forefront of martial arts cinema. It also did it […]
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Silent Night It’s Christmas Eve, and a small Midwestern town is preparing for their annual Santa parade. But while most of the populace is getting ready for the festivities, the local police department is secretly scrambling, desperately trying to find the culprit in a series of gruesome murders. Their only clue so far is a […]
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Gingerdead Man 3: Saturday Night Cleaver Thanks to some very blind and misguided animal activists, The Gingerdead Man is freed from his pastry prison and, with the help of some helpfully placed bumbling scientists, manages to evade his pursuers and escape into the distant past of…. 1976. He quickly loses his time traveling device, and […]
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Eye See You AKA: D-Tox Agent Jake Malloy is on the trail of a ruthless serial killer who likes to play games with his victims. Malloy boasts that he’s close to catching him, but when the murderer kills Malloy’s friend, and then his girlfriend, right under the agent’s nose, not even the killer’s death can […]
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The Gingerdead Man Psychotic killer Millard Findlemeyer decides to rob a diner one afternoon. While holding up the joint he shoots several patrons, including father and son duo, James and Jeremy Leigh. But for whatever reason, he seems to grow a sudden conscience when it comes to shooting the last witness, a young Sarah Leigh, […]
Read moreI can confirm that Tom Selleck’s mustache is great no matter the year, no matter the genre. You can practically feel the machismo oozing off of his upper lip’s grizzled fur baby. If you learn nothing else today, know that your face will never look as cool as his befollicled nasal undercarriage. And for that, […]
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The Dentist 2 AKA: The Dentist 2: Brace Yourself After an undisclosed amount of time, Dr. Feinstone manages to snag a hostage and successfully flee the insane asylum he was sent to after the first film. Fleeing California, he makes his way to the small town of Paradise, Missouri. Turns out his previous IRS problems […]
Read moreI love action movies with completely nonsensical, ridiculous plots that exist purely to put some completely miscast action star directly in the path of danger, possibly alongside an equally miscast comedian in a sidekick role. Lo and behold, here’s exactly what I want in a film: Knock Off. Jean-Claude Van Damme is a member of […] […]
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Random Movie Musings 