Puppet Master: The Legacy The man currently in possession of Andre Toulon’s puppets is confronted by a rogue assassin who tries to force him to tell her the secret behind the life-giving serum that animates the puppets and the history of their creation. Hmmm…well I see that plan A didn’t work well…. Dear god this […]
Read moreIf you own a failing farm, and you find a secret room in your barn with a scarecrow stuffed away inside, and your kid then claims it’s evil, do you put it up? Fuck no! You burn that bitch to the ground, salt the freaking earth, and move to the next God damn county, because […] […]
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The Orphanage AKA: El Orfanato After being adopted from an orphanage 30-years ago, Laura returns to the now closed facility with her husband and son, with the hopes of re-opening the orphanage for disabled children. She’s initially excited by the prospects, but she quickly comes to regret her decision, as outside forces seemingly cause her […]
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Four young tourists interested in the history of the Blair Witch arrive in Burkittsville, Maryland. Along with their tour guide, they head off into the Black Hills to visit the locals seen in the original movie. Their tour guide brings along several cameras to document anything they might find, but they don’t end up doing […]
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Eye See You AKA: D-Tox Agent Jake Malloy is on the trail of a ruthless serial killer who likes to play games with his victims. Malloy boasts that he’s close to catching him, but when the murderer kills Malloy’s friend, and then his girlfriend, right under the agent’s nose, not even the killer’s death can […]
Read moreCanada has given us many fantastic things over the years: comedians, beer, embarrassing photographs of their prime ministers, hockey supremacists, more beer, the list goes on and on. And most of those things are good. But are they truly great? Well…yes, ok, Canada has given the United States some truly great stuff. Awesome job, guys. […]
Read moreI didn’t go to my Senior Prom. School dances were never really my thing, despite having been to several, and I didn’t see much difference between a Homecoming versus a Prom. Why go to a place to grind, get drunk, and have awkward teenager sex under the watchful eye of an old guy nicknamed “Coach” […]
Read moreYet another made-for-TV Sci Fi Channel original movie. With terrible scripts, low rent CG, and low budgets consisting of pocket change and a used gum wrapper, these movies are perhaps more famous for being rip offs of better movie than they are for the list of B-list, C-list, and God only knows what-list levels of […] […]
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Random Movie Musings 