Nosferatu Do you really need a summary? Yes? All right then…Do you know the story of Dracula? Blood-sucking Count uproots from Transylvania and causes utter havoc in another town? ”Dilapidated, dank house. Perfect for conversion or the ravenous un-dead. Inquire within.” That ring a bell? Great, because this is the story of Dracula. The names […]
Read moreLet me just read you a few names from the cast list: Michael Fassbender, Charlotte Gainsbourg, J. K. Simmons, Toby Jones, Chloë Sevigny, James D’Arcy, and Val Kilmer. Sure, some of these folks have made some questionable movies, but to put it mildly, it’s amazing that they’re all a part of this massive train wreck […] […]
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Things Don and his friend Fred head out to a remote cabin in the woods to visit Don’s brother Doug, and his pregnant sister-in-law, Susan. The trip starts off being predictably uneventful, but unbeknownst to Don and Fred all is not right in the little cabin in the woods. Desperate for assistance to help them […]
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The Psychopath The Psychopath is about a series of bizarre murders set in England that poor, but tenacious, Inspector Holloway must solve. Along the way he discovers a link not only between the murders, but also investigates a possible conspiracy that leads all the way back to WWII. What makes the murders bizarre is not […]
Read moreIf you own a failing farm, and you find a secret room in your barn with a scarecrow stuffed away inside, and your kid then claims it’s evil, do you put it up? Fuck no! You burn that bitch to the ground, salt the freaking earth, and move to the next God damn county, because […] […]
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Uzumaki AKA: Spiral Kirie is a young high schooler in the small Japanese village of Kurouzu-cho, a quiet little place where nothing much happens. Until it does. It all starts when Kirie stumbles upon her friend Shuichi’s father intently videotaping a snail climbing up a wall. Kirie chalks it up to harmless odd behavior, but […]
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The Orphanage AKA: El Orfanato After being adopted from an orphanage 30-years ago, Laura returns to the now closed facility with her husband and son, with the hopes of re-opening the orphanage for disabled children. She’s initially excited by the prospects, but she quickly comes to regret her decision, as outside forces seemingly cause her […]
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Island of Blood AKA: Scared Alive AKA: Who-dun-it? A group of unknown actors are carted off to a remote island where they’re set to film an upbeat, low-budget, feel-good musical, with an old, historic school as the film’s backdrop. But the small group isn’t even there for a whole day before cast members start getting […]
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Rumpelstiltskin Somewhere in the 1400’s Rumpelstiltskin is being chased down by a mob after having spun some straw into gold for some poor woman… and then promptly running off with her small child. This is a very old story. You should really know how it goes. After retrieving the baby, one of the villagers curses […]
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Blood Harvest Jill Robinson, visiting her hometown from college, arrives in town to find her welcome anything but warm. The poor economy has caused the local bank to foreclose on several of the nearby farms, causing tension amongst the citizenry. The brunt of the backlash seems to be targeted at Jill’s father, whose job is […]
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Random Movie Musings 