Dolly Dearest is the story about a toy maker who uproots his family and moves to Mexico after he purchases an old derelict doll factory with the intention of mass-producing the hottest doll craze in recent memory (So, Cabbage Patch Kids?): Dolly Dearest. Unfortunately, he buys this amazing factory sight-unseen (the dumbass)… Look, ma! Actual […]
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Roger Cobb is a famous horror novelist who just moved into the house of his recently deceased aunt. Roger has a bit of a mixed history with this particular dwelling. It’s filled with fond memories, being the home his aunt raised him in after his parents died. But it’s also the home where his son […]
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Back in Medieval Germany (at least, I think it’s Germany) a large group of knights rides into a town where they believe a cult of witches/demon worshipers lives. Naturally, they slaughter every living thing they can find, because Medieval logic states that, yeah, those chickens were probably fine, but why take any chances? But even […]
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Parents is an American/Canadian horror-comedy from 1989. It’s protagonist, Michael Laemle, is a bit of an odd child. But perhaps that’s to be expected. He’s an awkward, naive ten-year-old growing up in the 1950’s and his parents have just uprooted him from his home in Massachusetts. It’s really not all that surprising that he might […]
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AKA Witch Bitch Businessman Michael is the proud owner of a popular and highly automated health spa. But after a series of strange accidents befall the patrons and the police get called, Michael has to figure out who, or what, is trying to sabotage his high-tech club. Perhaps we should ask this guy. He’s got […]
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Girl could use some moisturizer. A throng of teenagers with cliché personalities (plus one party crasher) are invited by the local goth kid in their history class, to a Halloween party at Hull House, a local abandoned funeral home that’s the location of a bunch of grizzly murders. Not only that, but it’s also supposedly […]
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Three local high school kids have found themselves in a bit of a pickle. They’ve managed to accidentally lose a cadaver their science teacher was going to use in class. Being the upstanding, conscientious students that they are, they decide to replace the missing corpse… by stealing one from the local Center for Disease Control. […]
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A NYC detective and a doctor get caught up in a surprise alien invasion after investigating a series of bizarre and violent rapes. There are some movies that are so bad they’re good. There are some movies that are so cheesy they end up being fun. But then there are some movies that are so […]
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C.H.U.D. is the story about how four individuals, a photographer, a model, a police captain and a reverend/soup kitchen worker, all get sucked into a massive missing-persons case that turns out to be a huge government conspiracy involving death, toxic waste, cover-ups and a group of very hungry, sewer-dwelling mutants. All hail our Chunky Soup […]
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The Sheriff of the sleepy little island town of North Point gets caught up in a tale of bloody, icky insect murder and evil corporate cover-up when pets, and then the local populace, start disappearing following a bizarre string of increased insect activity. The poor guy is trying to deal with what he can, but […]
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Random Movie Musings 