Deadly Blessings



Martha and Jim live on a rural farm surrounded by Hittites, a closed-off religious order that forbids too much contact with outsiders. Jim used to be a Hittite before marrying his wife, and often tries to play peacekeeper when there are misunderstandings between the sect and the other locals. But when Jim dies under mysterious circumstances, Martha and her friends find themselves beseeched by weird visions and odd occurrences that make them suspect that may not be as harmless as Jim claimed.



Deadly Blessings has been another film that’s been on my watch-list for way too long, and I figured now would be as good a time as any to finally get to it. Not only is it an early film by Wes Craven, but it also stars Maren Jensen, Susan Buckner, Ernest Borgnine, and is the first major film appearance of Sharon Stone. So the movie has a lot of actors that didn’t typically do horror. Thus it’s inclusion in my “Horror Movies Starring Celebrities You Weren’t Expecting” list. Well, Borgnine might have been in a couple, but he did a little bit of everything, so he doesn’t really count. Jensen and Buckner primarily worked in television, none of which was really horror related. And while Stone has primarily worked in movies, she’s mostly known for thrillers (well, one particular thriller…). The only other straight-up horror movie she was in was that ill-advised and (blissfully) forgotten Diabolique remake in the 90s, back when certain studios seemed cursed with an inexplicable desire to remake perfectly good classic films and… Well, it was a weird time and we all make mistakes. Anyway, this movie is considered a bit of a cult classic nowadays, and after finally watching it I can see why it might be fondly remembered. But I can also see why it got quite a few crappy reviews back in the day too.



Almost right off the bat I can tell this is a Wes Craven film. Not really due to one particular thing, but more an amalgamation of things. Not so much for the content (even though slashers were basically his bread and butter), but for the look and the feel, if that makes sense. It’s not some of his best work (he saved that for his projects), but the man was still good at creating a solid, creepy mood when he wanted to and there are several really memorable scenes throughout. And he must have managed to walk away with some inspiration from this, because there are also a couple of specific shots from this movie that are going to look VERY familiar if you’ve ever seen the first Nightmare on Elm Street. I mean, he must have really liked them the first time, because he essentially recycled them wholesale three years later. Not that I blame him though. They are very effective shots.





The movie’s problems really arise more with… Well, everything else, sadly. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a bad film, it just flounders in places. While I find the plot about a creepy religious sect/cult and the surrounding mysterious happenings interesting, in truth there’s very little actually going on in the movie story-wise for much of the film. I mean, stuff happens, but it happens in spurts and then tapers off for long stretches. So instead of Martha and her friends doing something interesting like trying to figure out what’s going on, they just sorta chalk it up to the religious nutters down the road and either try to ignore it, let the police deal with it, or think they’re losing their minds. Meaning that rather than advancing the story, a lot of time is spent watching Martha and her two companions sitting around fretting. And as you can imagine that’s not really conducive to engaging pacing. So expect the movie to be pretty damn slow until it gets to the ending, when everything kicks into high-gear and basically throws ALL the story and plot devices it can think to throw at you all at once. Which is crazy, but surprisingly pretty fun… Or at least it is until the last minute or so when the film decides to tack on a bonkers ending to an otherwise solid conclusion that really doesn’t make a lick of fraggin’ sense. You ever seen a film you otherwise liked that nearly sullied itself with the ending? Yup, it’s like that. I truly hope that there was an alternative out there somewhere and that the ending the filmmakers settled on was forced upon them, because good gravy is it DUMB.



The movie’s other main issue is the acting. Which, again, isn’t necessarily bad just…meh. Yeah, there’s some underacting and overacting, but I think that the main issue is that everyone just comes across as… okay. Like, Maren Jensen is fine in the lead, but she’s also not really all that engaging (though her getting attacked by a snake in the bathroom, screaming, running out of the room to grab a fire poker, and going back to the bathroom to beat the snake to death with it is a highlight of the film for me). And Borgnine is the big name star, and was even nominated for a Razzie for his role, but really he was… fine? I mean, it’s not his best work, but he wasn’t any worse than anyone else, so I don’t know what those Razzie people were thinking there. Sometimes I suspect those guys are just being dicks. If anything, Stone was way worse because it looked like she couldn’t seem to decide whether she wanted to play the role super serious or act like she was constantly on the verge of having a nervous breakdown. There was no compromise, there was no median. She had one of two moods: silently judging you, or screaming. Thankfully though she and most of the cast all look pretty stunning, so a lot of people probably won’t care all that much.


Here she is silently judging you, AND looking stunning. Because I know some people are into that.

So basically Deadly Blessings is a mixed bag. It’s well directed, technically solid, appropriately moody and has a handful of pretty entertaining scenes, some of which I really liked. But the pacing is rather crappy, and the acting and story veer all over the damn place like a car skidding on ice: “Uh oh!… Whee!… Ah!….. Okay we’re good-… CRAP, NO WE’RE NOT!…. Alright, we’re cool again… Wait, is that another ice patch?” I still ended up liking it, but it’s a ride and I wish it was better. But it’s still likely going to be entertaining enough for genre fans looking for some late-night viewing. So if that sounds like your jam, go for it. But if you want something faster with a better story, then this might not be for you.

Deadly Blessings is available on a variety of streaming services.

Deadly Blessings is also available on DVD and Bluray.

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